Defensive Mechanisms...

It's just funny. People have this unusual way of handling embarrassment (sorry, i speak well, but damn, my spelling needs work... hey that's why i have a dictionary... hehehehe). My husband and i were at NBI and there was this woman who was told to put her thumb mark on the clearance paper.

Okay, there's this guy who helps with the finger marking... and the girl just went over, coated her thumb with whatever they use for that thumb marking and stabbed it on her paper... then she made saw she a mistake... now then she turns to the guy and asks him if it was wrong and when she found out it was, she got all angry and blamed the guy for not helping her... how weird is that? And my gosh did she make a scandal out of the guy not helping her in the first place...

i don't know. it's nice to learn that there are people who have matured and learned to swallow their pride. it's just so easy to blow up and scream to the world that things aren't fair... but hey, it is fair, we're just not too happy with our share that's why we make lots of fuss about it.

i'm not saying we should just be complacent. that's not my point. we were born to be achievers, to finish goals... we expect a lot we need to work a lot for it... i don't know maybe it was easy back then when we didn't fall... but that was eons ago and i can't change it due to the fact that jumping generations won't cut it.

anyway, going back to being defensive... what is it all about anyway? i guess it's all that i think i'm better so i need to push my ideas more. how do we fix this quirk? do i say we need to grow up? hmmm... let me think... well, in order not to be defensive people need to see if what they have done is right or wrong... and admitting that you're wrong is one of the hardest thing someone can ever do. there's this big lump in your throat that you just can't swallow when you know you've made a mistake and since you don't want to swallow that you just burst out ranting and trying to prove your point.

but you know what, swallowing that big lump gets easier and easier and you notice that it becomes smaller and smaller as you learn to admit you're wrong... and so yes, growing up is needed to take away being so defensive. we're protecting ourselves when we become defensive. our ideas, our stuff, our points of view... but you know what... it's not just about you or me or the other guy... it's about everyone else. if you don't want to be proven wrong or if you don't want to have anyone challenge you, then be an island. you''ll have no care, you'll have peace of mind and you'll be alone. this isn't such a bad thing you know... but that's a totally different point now and i'm not going to going to that today.

oh well, so that's it for defensive mechanisms. here are tips by the way to be quickly helped by people working in our government:

1. smile, always greet people with a smile. the people who work behind the counters are important. they can make your life hell or they can make the process of whatever you're applying for become shorter. oh yes... it's supposed to be a genuine smile. from the core of your heart that would lift up your face and put twinkles in your eyes. hey it makes people warm all over.

2. be polite. call them by their names, not just boss, bossing, miss, psst! either sir or ma'am would do. and using po (filipino thing... this is a really important word. it gets you to different places in the philippines and lots of people to help you) with excuse me and other stuff that you wish to say. aside from being polite be contrite as well, no haughtiness here. it's a death trap when you become haughty and i tell you, the people at the counter will hate you forever.

3. be helpful. when the guy behind the counter loses his pen due to someone borrowing it, lend yours to quicken the paperwork he's doing. and when he reaches your documents you smile sweetly. he'll remember you for that. not only a he but also a she.

4. make simple, day to day chitchat. inform them about your hardships of applying for stuff because you know nothing... people love telling you what they know...

most of the stuff here are old news but hey, it's good to remember them once in awhile.

5. and lastly, never be afraid to ask. you're more stupid if you don't ask dammit!

so there... in all honesty this thing about defensive mechanism... it's just us being little again holding on to that comfort blanket that we always carry around. :)

later then

Hello there my dear friends and baby shower guests!

Baby shower: Febuary 19, 2006, Sunday at 4PM
At: 67 Celery Drive, Valle Verde 5, Pasig

For now here's the list of the food that we'll have on the 19th. I'll be updating my blog just to show you the food promised by other people so we won't have the same thing all over the place.

Since w'ere having an afternoon snack-coffee party here are the list:

Mitch - tuna and egg sandwiches, palitaw, iced tea and coffee
Elf - another bag of different coffee
Ditas - cheese cake
Cha - chicken empanada
Rod - korniks, pop corn and chips
Bon - chocolate mandarin with mint (this is a drink)
Ninang Rose - BBQ
Jean and Caesar - Pichi-pichi or palabok (will confirm later)
Henry - Mango Float
Van - Banana Cake
Ma - Spaghetti
Dinoy - 1 case of soda/cola
Switch - Dinuguan
Yvette - Pancit

Here are other details you might want to know :)

We are registered at Baby & Co. Podium (You may also go to the one at Rockwell) There are 5 discount coupons available for the first people who arrive there. (It's only valid for the stuff on the registry list and things that aren't on sale) ... But we'd be happy for stuff that aren't on the list! ;)

We'd really , really appreciate it if you confirm your attendance for the shower so we'll know how many tables and seats to prepare. :) RSVP with: Rod - 0920-9148154 or you can reach me through mail, my cell or ym.

That's it for now. Text, mail or ping us through ym. Thanks a lot you wonderful people!

Aha!

So it's been quite some time that i've actually written on my blog. I miss this. This being able to just tell the world of what i've been doing... i wonder why we do this?

I have lots of ideas, but i won't comment about it right now. I've got trillions to do... let me just list them down. NO this is not a ranting session... i'm just listing down the things i'm doing. Just to let you know as well...

1. I'M PREGNANT AND I'M GOING TO GIVE BIRTH THIS MARCH!!!

2. I'm preparing for a baby shower... you know what, it's kinda funny, my mom-in-law told me that i'm not supposed to be the one to prepare this and it's supposed to be my friends. it was the same thing my koala said. he said: "darling, your best friend should be the one preparing for the baby shower."

I kinda looked at him and said, "darling you're my best friend and you're my husband." then i nodded. "fine you prepare my baby shower." well, since it's not a surprise, i'm still doing it... i kinda not know if he can handle the entire prep thing... i guess he can, but he doesn't seem to have any time.

so there! i'm preparing for my baby shower. it's kinda cool really. and i'm so excited to do girly stuff other than my job. yes... let's go to number 3.

3. I'm still working. yes, i'm still dubbing and writing scripts. not to worry. i'll officially stop dubbing the last week of february, but i'll still do scripts.

4. I'm preparing for our church wedding as well. Haaaaay.... lots to do. but in a way it's kinda fun and crazy. looking into flowers, having cake tests, fittings for gowns, making invites, looking for strings, having to make a program, convincing in-laws that traditional weddings are out... talking to our priests...

this is a learning experience mind you. plus i get to interact with people who know alot more about the process of having weddings than i do. by the way, it's true, a wedding is a 1 year process. well, for a busy person like me. i couldn't have managed if it wasn't 1 year.

5. I'm rushing our requirements for our Canada application. don't laugh and don't take this lightly. it's hard. it's exhausting and time consuming. you need legal documents, bank statements, education documents and other stuff. this can't be done in one day and if you're as busy as me, your 1 month isn't much... so there.

6. Then we have to think about quality time for our family. whew! that's a lot to do.

i'm not complaining... the entire thing is just one big event that's waiting for it's culmination in June. i mean parang all the hectic thing will end by that time as the wedding will be done by then. next to me having the baby in March that's the next really big thing that's going to happen.

Hmmmm... i do need help. my mh is going to be looking at flower stuff and give aways. my bm's are the ones who i can't seem to give work to... maybe i should make them do lots of work on the wedding day itself. hehehehe... evil me. i'll just check out the stuff that needs to be done.

I'm also saying that not all the time everything's been peachy. there are those time that i had my "grrrrr" moments. and my "awww" moments... but i just bristle and grumble and then talk to my hubby about it then i mellow down again. heheheheh... i love my koala. i am able to tell him everything. it's nice to have open communication with the one you love.

remember: relationships aren't just about "ooohs and ahhhs" and "kissy-kissy", t's also "blah". so that's it for now. if i think of something else, i'll type it in.